Jokes that may offend!

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Post by Ben Reilly on Thu Feb 07, 2019 10:13 pm

In the spirit of "nothing's sacred," here's a thread for posting a certain type of joke. Not for the faint of heart or easily offended ...

A man comes home from work one day to find his wife waiting for a taxi in front of their house.

She's got her coat on and her bags packed.

The man asks, "Honey, what's going on?"

She replies, "I'm leaving you!"

He asks, "But why?"

And she says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile!"

And the man says ...

"Now, that's an awfully big word for a nine-year-old!"

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Post by Original Quill on Fri Feb 08, 2019 1:26 am

>THE Ben Reilly< wrote:In the spirit of "nothing's sacred," here's a thread for posting a certain type of joke. Not for the faint of heart or easily offended ...

A man comes home from work one day to find his wife waiting for a taxi in front of their house.

She's got her coat on and her bags packed.

The man asks, "Honey, what's going on?"

She replies, "I'm leaving you!"

He asks, "But why?"

And she says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile!"

And the man says ...

"Now, that's an awfully big word for a nine-year-old!"

No Mormon jokes, Ben!

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Post by nicko on Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:30 am

Or Muslim !
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Post by Victorismyhero on Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:02 am

Or gay

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Patience my Ass......I' m gonna KILLsomething

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[b]I DONT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by Victorismyhero on Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:03 am

Or Black

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If at any time in 2018 I have annoyed you, pissed you off or said the wrong thing....Suck it up snowflake, cause 2019 AINT gonna be any different

Patience my Ass......I' m gonna KILLsomething

.(It's hard to remember that the task is to drain the swamp, when you are up to your arse in alligators)

[b]I DONT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by Victorismyhero on Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:03 am

Or sexist

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If at any time in 2018 I have annoyed you, pissed you off or said the wrong thing....Suck it up snowflake, cause 2019 AINT gonna be any different

Patience my Ass......I' m gonna KILLsomething

.(It's hard to remember that the task is to drain the swamp, when you are up to your arse in alligators)

[b]I DONT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by Victorismyhero on Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:04 am

Or Jewish

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If at any time in 2018 I have annoyed you, pissed you off or said the wrong thing....Suck it up snowflake, cause 2019 AINT gonna be any different

Patience my Ass......I' m gonna KILLsomething

.(It's hard to remember that the task is to drain the swamp, when you are up to your arse in alligators)

[b]I DONT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by Eilzel on Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:08 am

My dad sent me this one last week, absolutely hilarious Smile

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in some time, gather at a bar to catch up. One man gets up to use the restroom, and the remaining three begin talking about their sons.

The first man says, "My son is my pride and joy, he started at the very bottom of a successful company, he studied hard, began to climb the corporate ladder, and is now the president of the company! He's so rich he bought his best friend a new Mercedes for his birthday."

The second man says, "That's amazing! My son is also my pride and joy. He began working for an airline company, and then went to flight school to become a pilot. He eventually became a partner of the company and now owns most of its assets. He's so rich, he bought he best friend a new jet for his birthday."

The third man says, "Well that's fantastic, my son is well-off too. He studied at the best universities, became an engineer, then started his own construction company and is now a self made multimillionaire! He bought he best friend a 30,000 square foot mansion."

By this time, the fourth man came back from the bathroom and joined the conversation. He said, "My son is gay, and makes a living stripping at a night club."

His friends reply, "That's awful! We're so sorry to hear that, you must be so disappointed."

The man replies, "No I'm not ashamed, he's my son and I love him. Plus, he's not doing too bad either. His birthday was recently and he received a 30,000 square foot mansion, a new jet, and a brand new Mercedes from his three boyfriends!"

Laughing

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Post by Ben Reilly on Fri Feb 08, 2019 9:38 am

This one's better spoken than read, but here's another one:

What did Michael Jackson love so much about twenty-seven year-olds?

There were twenty of them!

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