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Post by eddie on Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:41 pm

So....Ben “took a break” from the forum yesterday morning because he was stressed and angry like a volcano. He announced it in the mod section and also messaged some mods, privately.

Now he’s back. Less than 24 hours later. Suspect

Is that the quickest “break” ever? So Ben... 2190311264


Known why I’m doing this thread? Just to show you that we all have feelings, we all erupt and we are all human beings behind our screens. And sometime, we all need to know that.

Oh and also, so I can do this So Ben... 3489511464

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Post by Ben Reilly on Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:44 pm

It is a good point, and we would all do better to remember that each person on here is the central character in his or her life.

Oh, and before anybody gets any wrong ideas about edds or why she did this, let me set the record straight - it was her idea, but she told me first and I encouraged her.

Oh, and I'm doing this thread because I can say geranium now. What? I meant geranium.

Dammit, geranium! Ah, fuck it.

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And the more I go inside, the more there is to see ...

Makes no difference where you are
or where you're meant to be"

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Post by eddie on Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:46 pm

Don’t be a cunt. Rolling Eyes

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Post by Guest on Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:49 pm

I am not sure I even get the reason for this???????

Ben is about one of the most laid back people I know on the forum, and yet. He like everyone else has a breaking point, where enough is enough.

It happens and shows, what I already know that Ben is human, like the rest of us. Its just his breaking point is far higher than many on here and that is to be commended. Of which is why I do hold him in high regard.

What would be far more interesting, is to understand why and what made Ben snap?

Then actually, this would be better, for others to give support and advice.

Its better to share with many than to hold within a select group. As you then make the rest of us, feel as if we are not important to share the many ups and downs you may feel.

I know you have shared your frustrations with coming to the UK, but we are a family here and do actually care about you Ben

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:15 am

Didge wrote:I am not sure I even get the reason for this???????

Ben is about one of the most laid back people I know on the forum, and yet. He like everyone else has a breaking point, where enough is enough.

It happens and shows, what I already know that Ben is human, like the rest of us. Its just his breaking point is far higher than many on here and that is to be commended. Of which is why I do hold him in high regard.

What would be far more interesting, is to understand why and what made Ben snap?

Then actually, this would be better, for others to give support and advice.

Its better to share with many than to hold within a select group. As you then make the rest of us, feel as if we are not important to share the many ups and downs you may feel.

I know you have shared your frustrations with coming to the UK, but we are a family here and do actually care about you Ben

yeah, and damn right

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Post by Ben Reilly on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:20 am

Didge wrote:I am not sure I even get the reason for this???????

Ben is about one of the most laid back people I know on the forum, and yet. He like everyone else has a breaking point, where enough is enough.

It happens and shows, what I already know that Ben is human, like the rest of us. Its just his breaking point is far higher than many on here and that is to be commended. Of which is why I do hold him in high regard.

What would be far more interesting, is to understand why and what made Ben snap?

Then actually, this would be better, for others to give support and advice.

Its better to share with many than to hold within a select group. As you then make the rest of us, feel as if we are not important to share the many ups and downs you may feel.

I know you have shared your frustrations with coming to the UK, but we are a family here and do actually care about you Ben

If you care that much, can I have some money? Laughing

No, in all seriousness, eddie and I have a hard time some times. One night recently we both broke down and cried like babies for a really long time. Neither of us had ever done anything like it before, just crying in front of someone noisily for a long time. It was really cathartic.

Then, the other night (and I say this with her blessing), we had an argument, and I mean a bad one. I just felt lost and she was so upset the next day she was told she should go home. I went to work and basically made myself into a robot for the day.

I told the other mods I was going to leave the forum for an indefinite period, which is why edds is (with my blessing) taking the piss tonight.

The best part of this story is that we wouldn't be talking about it if we hadn't made up. The second-best part is that while I was in robot mode, I did some thinking that has helped me understand myself quite a bit better, and that will make me better for her.

Thank you for your kind words, and you too gels I love you

_________________
"When I look into your eyes, your love is there for me
And the more I go inside, the more there is to see ...

Makes no difference where you are
or where you're meant to be"

- The Beatles
Ben Reilly
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Post by Syl on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:43 am

I think we all wish we could wave a magic wand so you could be together, but we cant, so the least we can do is share your hoplessness when it gets you down.

I did it on a forum when my grandson had a bad accident when he was young, I did it when my mum died, and yes, writing down my sadness really did help.

Like Didge said, we are sort of a forum family....and it's good to share with people who care. x

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:45 am

*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:
Didge wrote:I am not sure I even get the reason for this???????

Ben is about one of the most laid back people I know on the forum, and yet. He like everyone else has a breaking point, where enough is enough.

It happens and shows, what I already know that Ben is human, like the rest of us. Its just his breaking point is far higher than many on here and that is to be commended. Of which is why I do hold him in high regard.

What would be far more interesting, is to understand why and what made Ben snap?

Then actually, this would be better, for others to give support and advice.

Its better to share with many than to hold within a select group. As you then make the rest of us, feel as if we are not important to share the many ups and downs you may feel.

I know you have shared your frustrations with coming to the UK, but we are a family here and do actually care about you Ben

If you care that much, can I have some money? Laughing

No, in all seriousness, eddie and I have a hard time some times. One night recently we both broke down and cried like babies for a really long time. Neither of us had ever done anything like it before, just crying in front of someone noisily for a long time. It was really cathartic.

Then, the other night (and I say this with her blessing), we had an argument, and I mean a bad one. I just felt lost and she was so upset the next day she was told she should go home. I went to work and basically made myself into a robot for the day.

I told the other mods I was going to leave the forum for an indefinite period, which is why edds is (with my blessing) taking the piss tonight.

The best part of this story is that we wouldn't be talking about it if we hadn't made up. The second-best part is that while I was in robot mode, I did some thinking that has helped me understand myself quite a bit better, and that will make me better for her.

Thank you for your kind words, and you too gels I love you

And hence that is what is so endearing about the pair of you and why I also believe that being apart. Has made you miles stronger than many couples that live together daily. All couples have fights and this (in my opinion) was more born out of frustration that you are not together. I think more on your part, because Eddie means so much to you, as you do to her. To be honest I am surprised it has not happened already and is very much an example of a cathartic situation mate.

Frustrations are born from a negative feeling, when they need to be turned as has happened into something positive. What you did, was better than most people do when they have arguments. You actually resolved them properly. You did'nt allow them to fester. When they are not properly resolved, they sadly over time turn into a hundred problems and then as time goes on, into a thousand problems. That soon, things that never bothered each of you before, become problems.

I think its a credit to you both, how you both looked past your differences here and frustrations through anger and now laugh about it.

A sign of true love.

Even those who truely love each other will fight at times. What is more important is how you can look back and laugh and take the piss out of each other over this. Though granted, I bet for a small amount of time you did both feel fear and sometimes that is good and one of the few occasions that I think its beneficial mate. The fact that your love is so strong, is why you did make up and I truely think you would each feel lost with out each other. The rareity of the kind of love you both share only happens to me, once in a life time. Most relationships are born more out of lust than love. Your relationship was born out of love, before any physical interaction ever happened. Hence that is something to be admired and truth be told. I think you loved Eddie before you even got together. I think she did also, but wanted to deny that she did.

It takes something to break Eddie's brick wall down, as i know she closely guards her emotions, even more how she has been so let down at times. Which means that makes you one of a kind to her mate.

Its just like when gelico speaks about her marriage. As much as she takes the piss and reminisces about her late husband. Its so magical how she tells her stories. Its like she is bringing him back to life. That to me, states to me, how and what a wonderful husband and father he truely was. I hate how she has lost him, but she continually keeps his memory alive and only true love can accomplish that.

Never lose that the pair of you, as you both have that. The very fact that you can take the piss out of each other and how you have the most wierdest quirky banter with each other. Is born out of one simple thing you both share and its something being an athiest I dont think exists.

Soul mates

Never lose that and anytime you do fight and here is my pennies worth if you do in the furture. Both catch your breath, take a deep breath and think why you are both or might being an arsehole to each other. As its never good to be stubborn, as nobody wins in such a situation. As then people have forgotten why they fell in love and are in love. We all have to give ground and it has surprised me that you would get annoyed mate, but to me. Its more born out of your frustrations on not being together.

Hope you both stay gold

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Post by Syl on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:58 am

Didge has a heart of gold when needed. I love you

Ben, just a tip, no point in flouncing if it's not public.
A bloody good flounce cleanses the soul, eases frustration, and renews energy for the next phase of forum life.

Please, next time let us all share in it. Cool

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 1:04 am

Syl wrote:Didge has a heart of gold when needed. I love you

Ben, just a tip, no point in flouncing if it's not public.
A bloody good flounce cleanses the soul, eases frustration, and renews energy for the next phase of forum life.

Please, next time let us all share in it. Cool


Lol, thank you Syl.

To me, the key to true love, is allowing ourselves to be truely vunerable

Its something we all shy away from and guard ourselves from showing

True love allows the vulnerabilities in people to shine through and be seen for what they truely are.

That we are all Human

People often shy away from allowing people into see them as they truely are and its a constant crying shame.

To me, we are at our strongest, when through love we are vunerable

It was really nice of Ben and Eddie to share this, even though it was so private. It shows they can laugh about how even at their worst, they can laugh about this.

I hold my hat off to that. That shows true character.

Have a great evening everyone.

x

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Post by Ben Reilly on Sat Oct 13, 2018 1:17 am

Thank you both, you have no idea how welcoming and warm you can make others feel. Didge, your insights are uncanny at times. And Syl, thanks for helping us make fun of something that in the moment felt horrible.

Both of you are just golden. Thanks for being here and I'm proud you're on this forum.

_________________
"When I look into your eyes, your love is there for me
And the more I go inside, the more there is to see ...

Makes no difference where you are
or where you're meant to be"

- The Beatles
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Post by eddie on Sat Oct 13, 2018 1:19 am

Well, this isn’t the first time we’ve screamed at each other to be fair. We did that the very first time we met, that same night, because we didn’t want to ruin our friendship...or some shit. I dunno, it was over some fuckeries that got us both irate and emotional.

But you guys have got a lot right. We are both very private people actually, yes, even me, I say a lot without ever really saying anything emotionally and I kinda wanted to show that we are all human.

It’s all I ever really try to say, in every post, in every way.

And really, I fucking love flaws in people. Let’s celebrate them, right?

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Post by eddie on Sat Oct 13, 2018 1:25 am

So Ben... E38cb010

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 2:03 am

*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:Thank you both, you have no idea how welcoming and warm you can make others feel. Didge, your insights are uncanny at times. And Syl, thanks for helping us make fun of something that in the moment felt horrible.

Both of you are just golden. Thanks for being here and I'm proud you're on this forum.


You both are great mate and you have a mountain of support here for you both.

I just dont know why you dont tell your story to the world, because if you did. Through the media, you would be able to have people willingly donate money in order. That you be together.

I know you want to do this off your own two feet, but do not be both too proud.

Allow others to help and telling your story. Will allow this to reach out to people who do have money and will be in awe at your love story. Willing to help. It would also provide advertizement for your book.

So its a win, win mate.

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Post by Syl on Sat Oct 13, 2018 11:47 am

Didge wrote:
*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:Thank you both, you have no idea how welcoming and warm you can make others feel. Didge, your insights are uncanny at times. And Syl, thanks for helping us make fun of something that in the moment felt horrible.

Both of you are just golden. Thanks for being here and I'm proud you're on this forum.


You both are great mate and you have a mountain of support here for you both.

I just dont know why you dont tell your story to the world, because if you did. Through the media, you would be able to have people willingly donate money in order. That you be together.

I know you want to do this off your own two feet, but do not be both too proud.

Allow others to help and telling your story. Will allow this to reach out to people who do have money and will be in awe at your love story. Willing to help. It would also provide advertizement for your book.

So its a win, win mate.

I agree with this, human emotions, especially if there is an air of sadness about them, touch other people.

I dont know much about these 'gofundme' type of sites, but I know people do donate to them if something pulls at their heart strings. One person donating £10 or buying your book wont make much difference, but if many people did it, it could make the difference between you two being together or apart. I love you

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 12:39 pm

I wish there was a different immigration system in place so you both could be together,If i had 44 grand I'd give it to you , that's the truth I would .x

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Post by eddie on Sat Oct 13, 2018 4:58 pm

Vicar of Dibley (vod) wrote:I wish there was a different immigration system in place so you both could be together,If i had 44 grand I'd give it to you , that's the truth I would .x

I think you would too. Many people have said that to us both.
Thanks for your support x

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Post by Guest on Sat Oct 13, 2018 9:02 pm

eddie wrote:
Vicar of Dibley (vod) wrote:I wish there was a different immigration system in place so you both could be together,If i had 44 grand I'd give it to you , that's the truth I would .x

I think you would too. Many people have said that to us both.
Thanks for your support x

you're welcome x

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