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Post by nicko on Fri 28 Sep 2018 - 13:50

Had a vasectomy because I didn't want Children,but when I got home they were still there!

Drinking Coffee in my slippers this morning and thought "I really ought to buy some cups".

My psychiatrist says I'm suffering from xenophobia. Bet I caught it off a Foreigner !
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Post by Jules on Sun 30 Sep 2018 - 17:05

I'm in total awe of ambidextrous people.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

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Post by Jules on Sun 30 Sep 2018 - 17:20

A farmer caught a 25yo lawyer trying his best to seduce his 17 yo daughter.


The outraged farmer yelled "how dare you try it on with my innocent young daughter?  You're new here aren't ya? In this village we  birch people who indulge in premarital sex. Do you have owt to say in your defence, you randy old goat"?

The lawyer thought for a while and timidly offered this excuse "Um yes, I had no intention of marrying her afterwards so it wasn't meant to be premarital sex. Do I get off on a technicality, sir"?


His screams could be heard for miles .....

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