My beautiful friend Lisa

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My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by eddie on Sun Oct 29, 2017 8:43 am

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Lisa died last night. I am so incredibly hurt and sad. I don't have the words right now so I'm just going to put something here that I wrote about her a few weeks ago:


My friend Lisa.

We met in school when we were both eleven. We ended up sitting next to each other in a classroom and some teacher was chatting some rubbish about something and one of us made a quiet joke and the other one laughed. She wrote me a note, (she swears I wrote the note because "You're the writer, I don't write notes!" - we have always disagreed on the note but I'm telling you it was her, she's always been braver than me), saying:

"Want to be best friends?"

And then, just like that, with no effort, we were.

We loved each other really quickly and we spent so much time laughing and daydreaming we didn't get a whole lot else done. We kinda blame each other for not getting good school reports and fucking up some mid-term exams, but as we kept reminding each other, we are in the TOP CLASS WITH NO EFFORT! How smart are we really?? Yeah.  We were smart. Imagine how smart we'd actually be if we concentrated.

We never did.

We ate ice lollies every lunch time - come rain or shine - because we loved the cherry-brandy-flavoured ice lollies. She became fascinated with watching me eat mine - I used to use the back of the long nail of my little finger to scrape the ice off the lolly and suck it off my finger.  She still tells everyone that it's the only time she ever watched someone eat an ice lolly and found it mesmerising...but then, she's  a little batty to be honest.

She would come to school, after having watched a film and spend the whole day, in snippets, telling me the whole story. I mean, she acted that shit out in front of my eyes, playing every part so that if I ever got to see the film, I was nearly always disappointed. She made her version better than the actual film and yet before she told it, I'd roll my eyes and sigh. She told it anyway and I quickly became sucked in.
I should've remembered back then, that no one tells a story quite like she does.

We gave each other anything we had, it quickly became a joke that neither of us would say we liked something for fear that the other one would offer it up. No one is as generous as Lisa, in gifts and time and spirit. She's truly got a golden heart of the very rare kind.

We got into trouble together and oh dear God, mostly it really wasn't our fault! We seemed to find ourselves in situations that were like a bad comedy sketch. We would turn to each other and say,  "How did that happen?"

It happened, because we were like a pair of little urchins who just played and forgot the time or where we were, or why we were supposed  to be in school.
We had no time for school because we had plans! Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney were  going to drive by our playground at any moment and ask us to come to the studio to record some songs. After all, we knew all the words to their two duets and never mind that hey were already hits - we didn't care - we were going to make it big time.

Mostly, I love to play with her hair, and swap socks. No idea why we do that but we do. It's a thing. Like eating cheese at 2am and saying that it's really time to go to bed but there's so much more to say!  And then lying in the dark and laughing at some stupid shit because we don't know how to stop.  
I love the passion we make when we debate an opposing viewpoint, getting louder and telling the other, "Oh you're talking bollocks!" and suddenly switching to ask if the other needs a top-up for their whisky, debate forgotten now because a really good song came on and we need to dance!! We love a whisky and we love to dance. And we love to sing and we love to be delighted that we still remember all the lyrics "after all these years!"

Mostly I love her energy and the strength she always seems to find for you when you can't find your own. She always has more than enough to spare.
I can't hide from her because she looks into me and she knows what I'm thinking and she knows when I don't have the words and she'll wait for me to find them...and when I do find them she bloody changes them and I get irritated:
"Stop changing my words! They're 'balloons' not 'bubbles'!" and she will "pfffff" me and say,

"Same thing. I know what you mean"

And she always does.

I love her with an innocence and a deep respect that I'll never describe even if I have all the words in the world at my fingertips.
I love her totally and I always will. She taught me how to laugh when I wanted to cry and made me face myself with her own unique brand of honesty.
She just knows me and she never judges me for whatever I do. She's a constant in my chaos and her sense of humour is my life raft. She understands when I don't cry and she knows when I can cry and sits quietly encouraging, while I do. I come away much clearer, stronger and calmer, just by being with her.

If she taught me anything it's that life is too short not to be lived totally and you really have to follow your heart; Hers is a huge one and she has room for so many.  I'm so glad I have a place there. For that, I'm eternally grateful.

Oh and she thinks she's always right and mostly she is, but I don't ever tell her that. Becasue she gets a bit big-headed.

I only hope I touch her life in the way she touches mine and I hope, if we do all end up as clouds one day, she and I will make a brilliant balloon/bubble shape together again.  

We will totally rock that fucking sky!











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Re: My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by Syl on Sun Oct 28, 2018 12:24 am

eddie wrote:You have all said such beautiful words and they all make perfect sense.

Thank you x  



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Re: My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by eddie on Sun Oct 28, 2018 12:27 am

*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:Really really nice post, Didge.

And since I told her I'd put it here as well:

"A toast to Lisa, who I never got to meet, but I wish I did.

Because my wife, who I love more than anyone in the world, loved her so much, she must have been one incredible woman.

To Lisa."


I truly more than like you. You know that?

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Re: My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by *THE Ben Reilly* on Sun Oct 28, 2018 12:29 am

eddie wrote:
*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:Really really nice post, Didge.

And since I told her I'd put it here as well:

"A toast to Lisa, who I never got to meet, but I wish I did.

Because my wife, who I love more than anyone in the world, loved her so much, she must have been one incredible woman.

To Lisa."


I truly more than like you. You know that?

Really? Wanna meet up for coffee some time?

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Re: My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by Guest on Sun Oct 28, 2018 1:18 am

*THE Ben Reilly* wrote:Really really nice post, Didge.

And since I told her I'd put it here as well:

"A toast to Lisa, who I never got to meet, but I wish I did.

Because my wife, who I love more than anyone in the world, loved her so much, she must have been one incredible woman.

To Lisa."

I will certainly join you in that mate

Cheers buddy

To Lisa

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Re: My beautiful friend Lisa

Post by gelico on Sun Oct 28, 2018 10:07 am

Didge wrote:Eddie, do you know what Liza would be saying to you now?

Stop being dispondent, as you know very well, a part of Lisa, will always live within side of you. I may not believe in religion, but am open to the possibility of life after death and if true. One person would have been standing right next to you in spirit on the day of your wedding to Ben, One thing death can never cheat us from, is the very fact of those shared memories we have together with the people we most love in life.

Now I know the lose of those we most love and cherish is hard, but to me, we should celebrate their lives and not mourn them. Because to me, they are at the very core of how we have come to be who we are today. They have helped shape and form our lives, as much as we did for them. She would not want you sitting down being sad today, but being happy at the time you spent together and no death can ever take that from you.

I know its hard to think that way, when we misss someone so much and you have this twice as hard, when you cannot be there with Ben. Your heartache must feel unbearable at times, but the one thing I know and even more how you ended up finding the love of your life in Ben. Is that deep down, for all the massive walls you present. You are the biggest softie I know. With that you are a big romantic (even though you will never admit so) Where I mean that in the best possible way. I know you have your needs and to be honest, you sadly lost a great friend phsycially, but psychologically and spiritually, she will always be with you. Maybe I am wrong and guessing, but maybe Ben is similar in ways with his laid back care free attitude on life. Maybe in a way her spirit and whilst alive in advice. Help draw you towards her through Ben. Ben is such a great bloke and I know him being there would make this easier and I only wish that you could be together. Life is shitty at times, but you put to shame the vast majority of cpuples that live day in and day out. You are showing your love is enduring thousands of miles apart

Dont be sad Eddie, think how you always laughed and smiled together. She would not want you to be down. Her essecence is now and always be within you.

Stay gold

x

what a beautiful post, didge

@ eddie, losing that physical connection when someone so close to us dies is the hardest part and even after some years there will still be a part of you that misses her but the wonderful love that you shared and the crazy times and all the laughs will never die. Our good memories that we can lock into at any given moment are out greatest treasures. keep them close and clear and keep your chin up in honour of the girl you loved xx

i suggest a large glass of whiskey

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