New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired

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Post by Guest on Sat Feb 27, 2016 4:54 pm

A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded. The study could lead to a fundamental change in understanding relationship formation--and it sounds a warning for the idea that couples can change each other over time.




The investigation's findings are presented in "Similarity in Relationships as Niche Construction: Choice, Stability, and Influence Within Dyads in a Free Choice Environment," in the current issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Assistant Professor of Psychology Angela Bahns (Wellesley College) and Professor of Psychology Chris Crandall (University of Kansas) are the paper's lead authors. In what might be considered a paradigm shift, the study's most surprising discovery is that people in relationships do not change each other over time. Instead, Bahns and Crandall's evidence places new emphasis on the earliest moments of a relationship--revealing that future friends or partners are already similar at the outset of their social connection, a major new finding, say the authors.
"Picture two strangers striking up a conversation on a plane, or a couple on a blind date," says Bahns. "From the very first moments of awkward banter, how similar the two people are is immediately and powerfully playing a role in future interactions. Will they connect? Or walk away? Those early recognitions of similarity are really consequential in that decision."


Whether or not a relationship develops could depend on the level of similarity the two individuals share from the beginning of their meeting. "You try to create a social world where you're comfortable, where you succeed, where you have people you can trust and with whom you can cooperate to meet your goals," Crandall said. "To create this, similarity is very useful, and people are attracted to it most of the time." Bahns adds, "Though the idea that partners influence each other is central in relationships research, we have identified a large domain in which friends show very little change-- personality, attitudes and values, and a selection of socially-relevant behaviors." She explains, "To be clear, we do not mean to suggest that social influence doesn't happen in relationships; however, there's little room for influence to occur when partners are similar at the outset of relationships." The data also suggests our drive to select like-minded others may be far stronger than previously assumed. "We're arguing that selecting similar others as relationship partners is extremely common--so common and so widespread on so many dimensions that it could be described as a psychological default," explains Bahns.
Bahns and Crandall stress the research shows people are not seeking shared similarity on one or two particular topics. "People are more similar than chance on almost everything we measure, and they are especially similar on the things that matter most to them personally," Bahns said.


The study has major implications for how we grasp the foundations of relationships and approach relationships when the partners are different. Its findings were derived from real-world relationships. Data came from a field-research method dubbed "free-range dyad harvesting," in which pairs of people interacting in public (romantic couples, friends, acquaintances) were asked questions about attitudes, values, prejudices, personality traits or behaviors that are important to them. The data were compared to see how similar or different the pairs were, and to test whether pairs who had known each other longer and whose relationships were closer and more intimate were more similar than newly formed pairs. They were not. Additionally, the researchers surveyed pairs who had just met (in a college classroom setting), and then surveyed the same pairs later. This allowed the benefit of longitudinal data, painting a picture of the same pairs over time. "In a smaller study that led up to this one, we looked at students at KU, a big state university, and several smaller colleges in western and central Kansas," Crandall said. "At KU, people found people who were more similar to themselves than at small colleges, where there just aren't as many choices in friends. At small colleges friends were less similar--but just as close and satisfied, and spent the same amount of time together. We know that people pick similar people at first, but if you go out of your way you can find excellent friends, and meaningful relationships, with people who are different."


Such dissimilar friends didn't necessarily blend their points-of-view over time, the study showed. "Anything that disrupts the harmony of the relationship--such as areas of disagreement, especially on attitudes, values, or preferences that are important--is likely to persist," said Bahns. She added this could be a "cautionary message" for those who think they can change their friends or romantic partners: "Change is difficult and unlikely; it's easier to select people who are compatible with your needs and goals from the beginning."
The researchers said the quest for similarity in friends could result in a lack of exposure to other ideas, values and perspectives. "Getting along with people who aren't like you is really useful," said Crandall. "Friends are for comfort, taking it easy, relaxing, not being challenged -- and those are good things. But you can't have only that need. You also need new ideas, people to correct you when you're loony. If you hang out only with people who are loony like you, you can be out of touch with the big, beautiful diverse world." Bahns notes the drive toward similarity presents the drawback of "limited exposure to different ideas and beliefs" along with rewards like "stability of identity, value systems, and ideology."


"[This is] the largest field study on friendship formation that I know of," said Professor Wendy Berry Mendes, the Sarlo/Ekman Chair in the Study of Human Emotion at the University of California-San Francisco. "The authors provide convincing data that friendships are driven more by pre-existing similarity between friends rather than friends becoming more similar over time due to influencing each other. [This research offers] one of the most definitive accounts showing that not only do 'birds of a feather flock together' but goes one step further to show that 'birds of a feather find each other before flocking.'"




Story Source:



The above post is reprinted from materials provided by Wellesley College.Note: Materials may be edited for content and length.




https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/02/160223102840.htm

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Post by eddie on Sat Feb 27, 2016 5:24 pm

Wow.
You don't say....!

Another study costing thousands no doubt, to tell us what all non-academics know already.


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Post by Guest on Sat Feb 27, 2016 5:26 pm

Actually it tells plenty Eddie as what about where opposites attract?

Studies like this are very important even if you do not think so

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Post by eddie on Sat Feb 27, 2016 6:18 pm

I have never thought opposites attract. That's why they're opposites, it can't work for long.

Having some opposite qualities within a relationship can work, they give balance, but a total opposite personality would never attract me or most people I would imagine and even if it did....I don't think it could last.

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Post by Guest on Sat Feb 27, 2016 6:24 pm

There you go Eddie, you have cause to investigate of your beliefs are true or false

Hence the study

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Post by eddie on Sat Feb 27, 2016 6:34 pm

Didge wrote:There you go Eddie, you have cause to investigate of your beliefs are true or false

Hence the study
l


Still didge, you have to admit, we all know that we prefer like-minded people.
It's like doing a study and finding out children prefer toys to lettuce.

Or something like that lol!

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Post by Guest on Sat Feb 27, 2016 6:38 pm

eddie wrote:
Didge wrote:There you go Eddie, you have cause to investigate of your beliefs are true or false

Hence the study
l


Still didge, you have to admit, we all know that we prefer like-minded people.
It's like doing a study and finding out children prefer toys to lettuce.

Or something like that lol!


lol no its not Eddie

I am open to many people myself, some very of the rails as well lol

We are a tad different as we are a bit more patient when people have issues or problems, so it opens up more avenues for me and you with people

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Post by eddie on Sat Feb 27, 2016 7:14 pm

I suppose so. Still a stupid study though

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3201073460

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Post by Ben Reilly on Sat Feb 27, 2016 8:57 pm

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired PsSOd

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sat Feb 27, 2016 9:01 pm

The op says it 'upends' the theory that opposites attract... in other words, it proves the theory to be wrong!


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Post by Guest on Sat Feb 27, 2016 9:03 pm

Does it?
This I must hear lol

You do understand this is talking about like minded?

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sat Feb 27, 2016 9:19 pm

First line of the op Dodge...


"A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded..."



lol!


Don't you even read your own op's Dodge. ..!?



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Post by Raggamuffin on Sun Feb 28, 2016 12:35 am

Birds of a feather flock together ...

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Post by eddie on Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:20 am

Raggamuffin wrote:Birds of a feather flock together ...

Two peas in a pod

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 6:08 am

Tommy Monk wrote:First line of the op Dodge...


"A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded..."



lol!


Don't you even read your own op's Dodge. ..!?




Yeah I read it, but your understanding of the English language is clearly poor

You said it proves it wrong

Really?

When does "suggest" equal certain proof?


New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464    New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464

Also do you understand what like minded means?

Its something you are miles removed from many on here

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 12:29 pm

Seriously Dodge...!?



It is clear that the op is saying opposites don't attract but instead we are attracted to like minded people.


You have obviously got things totally wrong when you read it going by your posts yesterday...

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 12:33 pm

I said...


'The op says it 'upends' the theory that opposites attract... in other words, it proves the theory to be wrong!'



Dodge said...


'Does it?
This I must hear lol

You do understand this is talking about like minded?'



lol!

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:51 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Seriously Dodge...!?

It is clear that the op is saying opposites don't attract but instead we are attracted to like minded people.

You have obviously got things totally wrong when you read it going by your posts yesterday...

WOW...and I didn't think I'd enjoy this thread for it's redundancy...and here's yet another time that the '#1 Troll got SERVED' New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 2581891615

Well, done TommyMonk - WELL DONE INDEED!

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:55 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Seriously Dodge...!?



It is clear that the op is saying opposites don't attract but instead we are attracted to like minded people.


You have obviously got things totally wrong when you read it going by your posts yesterday...


Really?

When does "suggest" equal certain proof?


New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464    New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464 

Also do you understand what like minded means?

Its something you are miles removed from many on here

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:56 pm

aspca4ever wrote:
Tommy Monk wrote:Seriously Dodge...!?

It is clear that the op is saying opposites don't attract but instead we are attracted to like minded people.

You have obviously got things totally wrong when you read it going by your posts yesterday...

WOW...and I didn't think I'd enjoy this thread for it's redundancy...and here's yet another time that the '#1 Troll got SERVED'  New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 2581891615  

Well, done TommyMonk - WELL DONE INDEED!  


Reported for nothing on the debate and trying to derail the thread with abuse

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:57 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:I said...


'The op says it 'upends' the theory that opposites attract... in other words, it proves the theory to be wrong!'



Dodge said...


'Does it?
This I must hear lol

You do understand this is talking about like minded?'



lol!


It proves you are one thick racist fuckwit ha ha ha ha ha

What does like minded mean Tommy?

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464


What does suggest mean Tommy?

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:08 pm

Dodge... the op clearly says that it is dismissing the theory that opposites attract and saying that it is like minded that attract!


Do you not understand this!?


How much clearer can I be...!?


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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:10 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Dodge... the op clearly says that it is dismissing the theory that opposites attract and saying that it is like minded that attract!


Do you not understand this!?


How much clearer can I be...!?



What does like minded mean Tommy?

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464 


What does suggest mean Tommy?

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464


Answer the questions dumbass


lol!

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:13 pm

Whether or not a relationship develops could depend on the level of similarity the two individuals share from the beginning of their meeting. "You try to create a social world where you're comfortable, where you succeed, where you have people you can trust and with whom you can cooperate to meet your goals," Crandall said. "To create this, similarity is very useful, and people are attracted to it most of the time."




But not all the time


So does that mean it upends that opposites attract?


Simply no


Poor Tommy fuckwit, simple cannot read anything


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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:15 pm

Do i really have to spell it out for you...!?


Like minded means people with minds that are alike and think a lot of the same things.



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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:16 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Do i really have to spell it out for you...!?


Like minded means people with minds that are alike and think a lot of the same things.




Which means there is not many people with like minded views with you lol

Whether or not a relationship develops could depend on the level of similarity the two individuals share from the beginning of their meeting. "You try to create a social world where you're comfortable, where you succeed, where you have people you can trust and with whom you can cooperate to meet your goals," Crandall said. "To create this, similarity is very useful, and people are attracted to it most of the time."




But not all the time


So does that mean it upends that opposites attract?


Simply no


Poor Tommy fuckwit, simple cannot read anything



New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464





What does like minded mean Tommy?




What does suggest mean Tommy?




Answer the questions dumbass



lol!

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:19 pm


"A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships... upends the idea that "opposites attract,"...


What do you think that means Dodge. ..!?



And then what do you think this means...!?


"...instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded..."


?




lol!



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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:21 pm

Poor Twatti

Lets point out two words that make him look dickless


A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded. The study could lead to a fundamental change in understanding relationship formation--and it sounds a warning for the idea that couples can change each other over time.


That is not something either conclusive or proving that opposites are not attracted

Poor Twatti

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:22 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Do i really have to spell it out for you...!?

Like minded means people with minds that are alike and think a lot of the same things.

You get 5 Gold Star Awards for your continued attempt to drag a 'self-inflicted' stupid human to the table of knowledge and greater understanding; while being trashed/defamed/insulted so thoroughly by his vile posts and lowest word usage.

Rather sad that such immaturity is allowed to sully every members opinion while he's allowed to post such ugly racial slurs and vile rants/spewing his ignorance every where!
But then the entire 'Like Minded vs Free Will Thinkers' is what feeds these type of hyena packs...that scent of blood lust is STRONG IN THE SOS HUMANS!

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:23 pm

aspca4ever wrote:
Tommy Monk wrote:Do i really have to spell it out for you...!?

Like minded means people with minds that are alike and think a lot of the same things.

You get 5 Gold Star Awards for your continued attempt to drag a 'self-inflicted' stupid human to the table of knowledge and greater understanding; while being trashed/defamed/insulted so thoroughly by his vile posts and lowest word usage.

Rather sad that such immaturity is allowed to sully every members opinion while he's allowed to post such ugly racial slurs and vile rants/spewing his ignorance every where!  
But then the entire 'Like Minded vs Free Will Thinkers' is what feeds these type of hyena packs...that scent of blood lust is STRONG IN THE SOS HUMANS!

Reported

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:25 pm

Aspca... his foul behaviour is more a reflection of him than having any effect on me...


And Dodge. .. you funked up!!! Just admit it and stop spinning!!!

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:27 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:Aspca... his foul behaviour is more a reflection of him than having any effect on me...


And Dodge. .. you funked up!!! Just admit it and stop spinning!!!


All except Bee can see you fucked up Twatti  Razz


Poor Twatti

Lets point out two words that make him look dickless


A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded. The studycould lead to a fundamental change in understanding relationship formation--and it sounds a warning for the idea that couples can change each other over time.


That is not something either conclusive or proving that opposites are not attracted

Poor Twatti

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:29 pm

Didge wrote:Poor Twatti

Lets point out two words that make him look dickless


A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded. The study could lead to a fundamental change in understanding relationship formation--and it sounds a warning for the idea that couples can change each other over time.


That is not something either conclusive or proving that opposites are not attracted

Poor Twatti

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464



Dodge... the whole point of the article and study is that it claims to show that opposites don't attract much at all and it is those of like minds who attract!!!


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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:31 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:
Didge wrote:Poor Twatti

Lets point out two words that make him look dickless


A path-breaking new study on how we seek similarity in relationships, co-authored by researchers at Wellesley College and the University of Kansas, upends the idea that "opposites attract," instead suggesting we're drawn to people who are like-minded. The study could lead to a fundamental change in understanding relationship formation--and it sounds a warning for the idea that couples can change each other over time.


That is not something either conclusive or proving that opposites are not attracted

Poor Twatti

New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464



Dodge... the whole point of the article and study is that it claims to show that opposites don't attract much at all and it is those of like minds who attract!!!



The whole point is you claimed it disproved opposites attract

It never did as seen

It shows you cannot understand English


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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:38 pm

The whole point of me even posting on topic was that it appeared that you thought it was claiming that opposites attracted more so when it was actually saying that opposites don't attract much at all but it is those of like minds who do!!!


You have made a fool of yourself again so stop spinning and splitting hairs about what I posted... I was just trying to make things clear for you by drawing a clear distinction.

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:42 pm

You said it disproved it Twatti

Now after you realise what a dick you made yourself look you now change your stance to now not much at all

Priceless

What did Twatti say first of all?

Tommy Monk wrote:The op says it 'upends' the theory that opposites attract... in other words, it proves the theory to be wrong!




New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 3489511464

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 2:57 pm

If a study 'upends' a theory then it is claiming to prove it wrong!!!


You bell end!!!



Stop spinning and splitting hairs!!!


You misunderstood what was being said in the op because you have a poor grasp of English!!!



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Post by Syl on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:10 pm

I'm not sure that like minded people are more often attracted to each other than people who often oppose each others viewpoints.

For a start the main pull of attraction is usually physical.....then a couple usually find some thing that they agree on.....which isn't hard even if the only thing they share is a likeness for cats or dogs....they build on that if the attraction is strong..

After that I think opposing views makes life interesting...my OH and I seldom agree on politics and lots of other stuff and we have been together for ever....I actually think a sense of humour is as important as anything else.

Family bonds couples together....and that comes long after the first pull of what's attracted you both in the first place.

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:12 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:If a study 'upends' a theory then it is claiming to prove it wrong!!!


You bell end!!!



Stop spinning and splitting hairs!!!


You misunderstood what was being said in the op because you have a poor grasp of English!!!




You have proven again you are an idiot ha ha ha ha

It does not disprove anything as still some opposites attract

You claimed it had been disproven

Which proves why you are as thick as shit Twatti

lol!

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:43 pm

The op was making the claim in the first sentence...

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:45 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:The op was making the claim in the first sentence...


No you made a claim that was wrong

I suggest you move on muppet as its there for all to see your massive error

It was also absolutely hilarious

Time and time again you do this as you fail to read anything

No need to continue this farce with you any longer either, so I shall just enjoy watching you sulk

lol

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:48 pm

Tommy Monk wrote:The op was making the claim in the first sentence...
**BINGO**
Is that the 3rd or 4th time you've posted that exact thing; feeling like the attempt is just futile and the 'Self-Inflicted' is willfully either playing utter ignorance so he's got some adult stuck in a communication exchange with him or he's SOS {stuck on stupid} and there's A B S O L U T E L Y no use New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 2396444674

You are a marvel of fortitude dear man! 5 stars and 6 thumbs up! LOL

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 5:48 pm

aspca4ever wrote:
Tommy Monk wrote:The op was making the claim in the first sentence...
**BINGO**
Is that the 3rd or 4th time you've posted that exact thing; feeling like the attempt is just futile and the 'Self-Inflicted' is willfully either playing utter ignorance so he's got some adult stuck in a communication exchange with him or he's SOS {stuck on stupid} and there's A B S O L U T E L Y no use New study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired 2396444674  

You are a marvel of fortitude dear man!  5 stars and 6 thumbs up!  LOL


Reported

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Post by Tommy Monk on Sun Feb 28, 2016 7:04 pm

Firstly... aspca... thank you again...

It was Dodge who posted the op which was claiming to have completed a study that shows that opposites hardly attract at all and it is in fact overwhelmingly that people of like minds attract.

I haven't made any speculation on whether I think it is right or not or if I think opposites or like minded people attract or not...

My only comment was to point out to dodge what the op was actually claiming... because it seemed to me by a couple of his earlier posts that he had misunderstood the premise of the articles claim, and I wanted to put him right on it...



Secondly... Dodge. .. after all your rudeness and abusive insults since then... what is it exactly that you think gives you any justification to start reporting the posts of others here...!?

And what exactly is it you are reporting about anyway...!?

I don't see any abusive rudeness in aspca's posts that you claim to have reported... can you explain which bits are against the rules...!?

And then explain how they are against the rules but your abusive posts aren't...!?

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Post by Guest on Sun Feb 28, 2016 7:43 pm

Simply Tommy

He is not debating any of the points but looking to derail the thread

Its not my fault you are thick as easily proven here by your own error

Either that idiot is bee or shady

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